Sick Of Scummy Paleo Marketing?
Lately, I feel as though I've been getting bombarded with a lot of shady marketing by paleo and other health companies associated with paleo/primal/bio-hacking.
Maybe I'm just being cranky this morning, but it's really pissing me off.
Take this, for example: http://www.sexyyoungeryou.com/
I signed up for free to get access to the sexyyoungeryou sessions because Dave was going to be on one of them. Then, I get an update that tells me that they are offering me AN AMAZING DEAL!!!!!!!!! Wow, what could it be? I'm already getting to listen to the entire lecture series for FREE, what could be better than FREE, right? Well, it turns out that they are offering me the entire audio series, AGAIN, for only.....$150! Wow, really? That's almost better than free. But, wait, there's more! for only $50 MORE dollars, I can upgrade to the PLATINUM PLUS BONUS PACKAGE (I fucking shit you not) and get text transcripts of all of the sessions that were originally free! But wait, I also get a couple of online pamphlets and introductory pieces of information from other health experts that aren't really worth anything, because all of that info is pretty generic and available for free everywhere else on the internet. How much is all of this technically worth, you ask? How about a $4,725!!!! If I bought all of that individually, I would be spending almost five fucking thousand dollars! This is how they really pitched this garbage to me.
Let's recap, here. They are offering me a chance to PAY for these audio sessions, which I'm already listening to for FREE, plus text transcripts and a few other generic intros to health, infographics and audio clips, which have a near $5,000 value, for only $199? Holy shit, where do I sign up?
Who in their right fucking mind would spend $5,000 buying this shit, anyway? I hate how these companies have to add up all this imaginary "value" and tell you how their product is really worth thousands upon thousands of dollars, but right now, just for you special customers, for a limited time, they are offering a 96% discount!!!!!
I got into this new health movement because it's supposed to be the anti-thesis to the corrupted, bought-and-paid-for-by-lobbyists standard American diet. It's supposed to be about honesty, it's supposed to be straight-forward.
I got another email from Paleohacks telling me that I only had 6 hours left to take advantage of this other amazing package that was literally worth thousands of dollars, but offered right now, for a limited time only, for $37. But, don't delay, because once the six hours is up, it would literally be GONE.....FOREVER!!! Fuck you. Seriously, fuck you, marketing assholes.
If you know of a local resource that I haven't listed, or have a warning for known local health scams or bad "BP" businesses, please PM me.